worth sharing.

"Cross over, My children,
From all you have known, seen and tasted of My presence.

For all that has passed before you on the journey of worship
Has been to bring you to this place.

For I am taking the heart of stone
Out of the lives of My people
To free them from selfish restraint and self-preoccupation
That they may behold Me.

In these days, I will be your reward as you worship.
You will enter into that place of adoration
That the angels occupy around My throne.

For it shall be on earth, even as it is in heaven.
Worship from the earth shall ascend and meet
Worship descending from heaven.
When the first heaven meets the third heaven
In adoration,
All that is demonic in the second heaven
Shall be displaced by the weight of glory.

For I shall come down into that place of adoration
As you seat me on the throne of your passion.
When I come, all things will change.
I will adorn My bride with My beauty
And make her ready for My intimate embrace.

Cross over, My children,
Set your heart to cross over
Into a new land of worship.

Press in, press in,
Learn to stand in joy and admiration.
Receive the stamina, the discipline, the will
To push your heart forward.

Give yourself, do not withhold,
But push, push on, push through.
Give birth to a new song
That will captivate your heart as it captivates Mine.

This song will fill the earth.
It will fill My house.
It will fill My temple
Even as it fills your heart.

A new land awaits you.
Go in and possess your possessions.

In worship, in adoration,
Receive My longing for you.
Let My aching heart refresh you,
Replenish you, restore you."

(Drawing Close by Graham Cooke)

garden.

I'm no longer my own I'm Your garden.


My thumb doesn't have even the slightest green tint to it. I have always admired those who find solace in their gardens, those who could waste their days away merely pulling weeds, planting bulbs, and pruning limbs..but alas, I fall more in the category of someone who finds a way to kill even the plastic indoor plants.
Thankfully, this has in no way deferred the diligent work of the Ultimate Gardener in my life. God let me in on a brilliant revelation the other day: I am his garden. It makes so much sense, in so many ways..it's a wonder I didn't catch on sooner! We serve a clever God indeed. :)

As my own personal Gardener, my Beloved cares for me tenderly and delicately. He takes note of my sweet and gentle petals, and faithfully protects every baby green shoot that ventures to poke its head out of the soil. He waters me daily, taking care to not drown my fragile roots, and is sure to add some fertilizer on those days that are especially dry. His rays of sunlight stimulate my growth and coax me to let my petals bloom. When weeds sprout up in attempt of choking my roots and stealing my nourishment, he plucks them out..and being the meticulous Gardener that he is, my Beloved makes a point to get those weeds out at the root-none of that surface business. He is even teaching me to recognize those weeds that disguise themselves as flowers, so I can learn to not let them take root in the first place. One of my favorite things about having my Beloved as my Gardener is how he loves to admire my beauty. He takes time to sit and smell the fragrance of my flowers, and simply take in the simple elegance of my vibrant colors and textures. Though it's not all about aesthetics; gardens require upkeep as well. In his love for me, my Gardener gently prunes and discards those branches that detract from my beauty, and those flowers that I have allowed to wilt and die. Pruning can be a long and painful process, but is necessary in order to achieve my ultimate purpose as a garden: a harvest. All of his dedication in tending to and caring for me is essentially so that I may bear fruit for him to enjoy. I sit in precious anticipation for the day of the full harvest..but until that day I am enjoying this period of growth and new life!

Isaiah 58:11 The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.

Song of Solomon 4:12 You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain.

John 15:1 "I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener.



It's You and me alone God You and me alone Here it's You and me alone God You and me alone

You've hedged me in with skin all around me I'm a garden enclosed a locked garden Life takes place behind the face.

So come into Your garden Come into Your garden.

Here O Lord! Have I prepared a place for You!

I'm no longer my own I'm Your garden.

heart.

I think the heart is much more fragile than we realize. But, we must cherish that delicacy, not squander it.
Jesus showed me a picture the other day of how we can best take care of our tender hearts.

He started by showing me an image of his royal sword pinning my heart into the ground, holding it stable--he chose me. A strong wind then proceeded blow all of my heart away, leaving only the tiny piece that was held down by the sword. I picked up that remaining fragment of my heart, and timidly held it up to my Lord. My demeanor was similar to that of a young girl holding up her somewhat pitiful stick-figure drawing to her mom or dad. Though my offering was meager, battered and bruised, my Jesus looked upon it with pride and absolute bliss. He told me gently that it was very important for me to keep my arm extended towards him, and to keep my hand open and unclenched. Times might become seemingly volatile, but I needed to trust him with this precious cargo. Soon enough, a violent storm raged about me, and it appeared that my heart could go flying out of my hand at any moment. But I obeyed what he asked, and left my fingers open and my heart exposed. He rewarded my trust as his gentle hands slowly enclosed my small hand, protecting my heart in his delicate grasp.
And now he tells me, "My child, I have created your heart to be sweet and delicate with the purpose that you would need me to guard it and cherish it. Leave it in my hands and I will gladly keep it safe from harm, and restore it in fullness."

Psalm 119:32 I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.
Proverbs 4:23 Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

pray//peace.

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:4-7

As Jesus followers, we have an incredible force at our finger tips that, I have realized as of late, is extremely taken for granted. We have personal access to the one who dictates our very breath, found in the (slightly "Christian-esed ") power if prayer. A reoccurring lesson that God was helping me understand on my recent trip to South Africa is that of me having this overwhelming tool in my very own arsenal, yet hardly using it.

He revealed to me that when I was stuck on the sidelines while my Parable teammates were performing dramas, I should have been praying. He healed me from my illness, and blessed me in that healing by bringing our team in South Africa and my loved ones back home together for unity in prayer. He informed me that though Satan sometimes has access to our flesh and our environment, he can never intervene in our ability to pray.

Since I have been home, I have been facing various decision-making opportunities that we often come across living in the world but not of the world. I have been desperately seeking his peace, and striving to follow his guidance, though I haven't had an enormous amount of success with either of these endeavors. Among a few glimpses of his peace, I have been bombarded by anxiety and fear. As of tonight, I have realized WHY I seem to have fallen short in my pursuit for absolute peace. He tells me: "Do not be anxious, my child. Come to me, thank me for my goodness, and ask me for the yearnings of your heart. I will protect your heart and ease your mind. This anxiety and worry is not a burden you must bear. Rejoice! Take part of my overwhelming joy!"

I have been asking to rest in his peace, I just hadn't quite figured out how to find it yet :) Now it is a matter of seizing the power of prayer, and allowing his peace to come! Join me?

sacrifice.

sacrifice: "surrender of something highly valued for the sake of one considered to have a greater value or claim"

gift: "to present voluntarily and without expecting compensation"

A gift is different than a sacrifice. A simple and somewhat obvious conclusion, yes, but is it one that we take the time to really and fully grasp? A gift is a voluntary act of merely handing something over to the other party involved, while a SACRIFICE includes letting go of something highly valued for the sake of that other person. I've recently come to understand the somewhat painful revelation that I have been giving my life to the Lord, but not sacrificing it to him. In only offering my life as a gift, I was able to 'secretly' hold onto the parts of it that I valued the most. In the gentle, yet firm way that only the Father can, he pulled back the veil and revealed how I had been deceiving myself and refusing to enter into the fullness of life that he has for me.

Growing up with a wonderful family and stable home, I was never really exposed to a sacrifice visible to the naked eye. I had what I needed and didn't need to make any sacrifices to 'get by.' The closest I got to knowing sacrifice was giving up the name brand shoes for a similar pair that was half the price, due to my ever frugal mother. :) I would read Matthew 16:24-25 (Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.) but I never truly comprehended the extent of what Jesus meant. Sure, I would give up my life to follow my Savior, but sacrifice everything? There must be some fine print at the bottom allowing us to keep a hold of the things we really cherished... As ridiculous as that sounds, it is exactly how I was choosing to live my life for the last 20 years. I was managing just fine too, until God tried a different approach (apparently his blatant statement in Matthew wasn't quite direct enough hah). He recently has asked me to surrender my heart fully to him. That includes everyone I love on this earth, in other words-those I hold dearest, and what I attribute the highest value to in my life. Prying my white-knuckled fingers off the edges of my heart was no easy task, and the pain that accompanied this endeavor was just short of excruciating. Even with my gentle and loving Father walking beside me, encouraging me to continue through this painful process, it was still 20 years of holding tightly that I was trying to release. But He who is in me is greater than he who is in the world..these things that I treasured so dearly, are still of this world and do not hold the eternal value of his salvation. Relationships and fellow children of the King are beautiful gifts that we should cherish throughout our lifetime, but they should never come before our Creator in our hearts!

It made sense that God was asking me to surrender my heart. He doesn't ask us for just the parts of us that are easy to toss aside, he wants what means most to us because it means the most to him as well. When we sacrifice, it is releasing those things that we deeply value, not what we could easily live without. The beauty of it all, is that once we have surrendered and made the sacrifice that he asks of it, we are wonderfully rewarded for it. Though a sacrifice is made with no motivation of compensation, our Father rejoices in being able to bless his children.

Sacrifice brings deeper intimacy, new levels of beauty, and a further knowledge of the love and grace of our God. Nothing on this earth, even those we hold the most dear, can compare to an increase in our growth with Jesus.

Integrity

Wrestling with God is not something I would recommend; he tends to win with flying colors, every time. A recent revelation showed me that the past few years I have been adamantly attempting to defy the calling the God has on my life. Silly me.

As I look over my teenage career, I have wondered numerous times what kept me from straying down the path of "rebellion" that so many of my peers chose. Odds were against me as a majority of teenagers these days dabble (those last 4 words make me sound 3 times my age...) in something that disagrees with the morals their parents ingrained within them throughout their childhood-such as partying, drugs, sex, etc. But not me, I was dubbed the "Goody-Two-Shoes" at an early age and most definitely lived up to my name. Taking it even a step further, those times that I did drastically "slip-up" caused me a seemingly great deal more conviction and agony than that of my friends if they were to make the same mistake. Why? There were certainly times that I wanted to break out of the stereotype that I had been confined to, but the opportunity never seemed to fully present itself. Obviously, I can see now that God was protecting me, saving my innocence and preserving my purity. I assumed that He would incorporate that into my testimony to be used further down the road, possibly in giving hope to young girls that it is possible to refrain from giving into peer pressure or something along those lines. I figured He knew what He was doing and I should leave it at that.

Recently God decided to give me a little insight, and to show me that I didn't exactly have it right. I learned that he has placed upon me a calling of integrity. Which explains much of why I felt pressure through the years to live above the standard; those in authority recognized that calling and did their part in obedience to help me steward it. But oh the irony-I am one who has always struggled with living a performance oriented life, and have only recently come to understand that God's grace, love and faithfulness towards me is NOT dependent on my abilities. Isn't it just like Him to anoint me with a calling of integrity, something that could so easily shift into a measurement of performance? But he has intended for it to be pure and holy, and nothing of my own works. It is more of a smack in Satan's face, as He turns a weakness of mine into a beautiful strength.

Now I am learning not to fight what he has ordained me for. Yes, it comes with greater expectations and higher standards, but also a greater portion of his strength. He abundantly makes up for our lacking. All he asks is trust. I trust that He knows me, and the path that he has paved for me is in perfect concordance with who He created me to be.

Psalm 37:3-7

³ Trust in the Lord and do good. Then you will live safely in the land and prosper. ⁴ Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires.

⁵ Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you. ⁶ He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn, and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

⁷ Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act.

"Good News for the Oppressed"

¹ The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me,
for the Lord has anointed me
to bring good news to the poor.
He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted
and to proclaim that captives will be released
and prisoners will be freed.
² He has sent me to tell those who mourn
that the time of the Lord’s favor has come,
and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies.
³ To all who mourn in Israel,
he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
that the Lord has planted for his own glory.

⁴ They will rebuild the ancient ruins,
repairing cities destroyed long ago.
They will revive them,
though they have been deserted for many generations.
⁵ Foreigners will be your servants.
They will feed your flocks
and plow your fields
and tend your vineyards.
⁶ You will be called priests of the Lord,
ministers of our God.
You will feed on the treasures of the nations
and boast in their riches.
⁷ Instead of shame and dishonor,
you will enjoy a double share of honor.
You will possess a double portion of prosperity in your land,
and everlasting joy will be yours.

⁸ “For I, the Lord, love justice.
I hate robbery and wrongdoing.
I will faithfully reward my people for their suffering
and make an everlasting covenant with them.
⁹ Their descendants will be recognized
and honored among the nations.
Everyone will realize that they are a people
the Lord has blessed.”

¹⁰ I am overwhelmed with joy in the Lord my God!
For he has dressed me with the clothing of salvation
and draped me in a robe of righteousness.
I am like a bridegroom in his wedding suit
or a bride with her jewels.
¹¹ The Sovereign Lord will show his justice to the nations of the world.
Everyone will praise him!
His righteousness will be like a garden in early spring,
with plants springing up everywhere.

Lately I have been coming before the Lord, asking him to reveal my calling, my giftings, my purpose.
He has already shared the burdens of his heart for the poor with me, but I am aching to know specifically how he wants to use me. What has he molded into me, Britni Steiling, that will be used to further his glory, his love and his Kingdom? I long to know the power that is resting within me, that accompanies his Spirit residing in me. I want to see action, I want to know purpose, I want to get out there and GO! (One thing is for sure, patience is not a virtue that he has given me in abundance hah). My mind is bombarded with questions of potential gifts that I may have but am not acting on. Healing? Prophecy? Faith?

His answer demonstrates his constant, solid character: "Quiet, my child. Rest, my child." Then the passage above, Isaiah 61, came to mind. I have read these verses time and time again, and everytime I do, they resonate so strongly. Oh Jesus, he is so very patient with his children. Here is my calling, here is what my heart is burning to do! I have been called to fight justice. Because of the grace and redemption he has shown me, I will comfort the brokenhearted, proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. I will bring joyous news that gives reason to dance. I will share a Savior who leases those into torment to run into freedom! I will plant gardens, establish roots, and watch flowers bloom!

So, it may not be found in the lists of 'Spiritual Gifts' found in Ephesians or Corinthians or Romans...but God has called me to bring Justice, and with the power of his Holy Spirit moving before, behind, and through me, justice will be brought! Whoever said God was conventional anyway? This is what I know that I have been created to do in the here and now, so let's see some action :)