merely but a vessel.

2 Timothy 2:20-22"Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor. Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work. Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness,faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart."

I am merely but a vessel, intricately crafted by my Creator with the purpose of holding and overflowing his love. This has only become clearly evident to me recently, as the chips and cracks inflicted upon my fragile clay body have penetrated all the way through: leaving me in broken shambles at the foot of my Creator. Over the course of my life I have been nicked and damaged, but my outer shell has withstood these blows so that I have not yet been shattered. I had learned to scrounge around my environment in search of pitiful improvisations with which to mend my imperfections: putty, toothpaste, glue..anything that might suffice in place of the genuine clay that Christ used when he first created me. Naturally, this didn't make for a vessel that could hold much of what I was intended to carry, at least not for any length of time. But at least I appeared whole to the naked eye, my audience didn't need to know the purpose I was originally crafted for.
But now I find myself having been broken. My pitiful attempts to cover my brokenness have entirely crumbled away, leaving a mess of jagged shards and ugly scraps of what was once an elegant masterpiece. How shocking and heartbreaking it must have been for my Creator when he first noticed t he utter destruction his handiwork had been subjected to.

But I do not sing a song of remorse and despair! For my creator has patience and hope that outlasts even the grimmest of situations.

He is taking the fragments of baked clay littered at the foot of His cross and gently yet precisely fusing them back together. The most beautiful part of it is that though faint lines can still be seen where the cracks once were, the vessel he is putting back together is seamless and completely sealed. Soon, I will be able to hold his Living Water inside of me without a single drop being able to escape.
As I am being delicately repaired, I am beginning to understand more and more of my purpose. I have a calling so much greater than that of being admired from a distance, as I was previously settling for. When my Beloved first sat at his pottery wheel and stared at the meager lump of clay in His hands, he dreamed of a child set apart: one who would bring Him glory and fall before Him, one who would reap His sacred harvest and be His hands and feet in this lost and broken world. I was created to be filled with His Living Water. I was called to one day be filled to overflowing with that life-giving Water, so others may drink of it as well. At this season in my life, I am still allowing Him to repair me so that I may be able to hold more of Him, and people in my life may come and take a sip from the rough rim of my jar. One day, in His sovereign timing, I will be fully r epaired and he will continue pouring into me, so that I will literally overflow with the Life he gives.

"Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare...Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near." (Isaiah 55:1-2, 6)

My favorite part of being a vessel is that that is all I really am. It is HIS Living Water within me that brings life. It is He who created me, mends my broken pieces, and equips me to hold His water. It is He who pours abundance into me to others may partake.

He is the source. And a beautiful one at that.

"Sculpting every move, you compose a symphony."



"Sometimes we are called to come down from the hill where the light is and step into the fog. We go there to help those who don't know Him to interpret the light when it reaches them. Let God burn the clouds away while we reach to His people."One of the most treasured moments of my day is when I open the door to my warm, inviting apartment after my last class, pull on a pair of my dad's old sweats (which are always more comfortable than my own) and burrow down into my rocking love seat..topping it off with my Snuggie, of course. Nothing compares to being bundled up in multiple layers, a cup of tea in hand, and the stresses of the day disappearing into the distance; it's the epitome of comfort.
Now, shift gears:
My brother Seth and I always cringed at the question frequented by our dad during our childhood: "Hey kids, how about some 'bonding time' with dad this afternoon?" Don't get me wrong, I love my daddy and very much enjoy spending quality time with him...but that's not exactly what he was referring to. 'Bonding time' with dad usually consisted of pulling weeds in our beast of a garden, edging the lawn by hand, raking leaves, or something to that nature. These activities were never at the top of my list for how I preferred to spend my afternoon, and the clothing attire required was decidedly less comfortable than that of my snuggle-wear mentioned previously. In gearing up for yardwork, mom made sure I put on my "grubbies," and dad was always considerate in offering me a pair of his old work gloves, which never failed to be twice the size of my hands. I was undoubtedly a sight for sore eyes. Once again, the most rewarding the aspect of 'bonding time' (aside from actually spending time with dad, of course) was coming inside afterward and changing into my warm, comfortable sweats.
Recently I have been challenged in my faith at the realization that I have been inching back towards my precious and well-guarded comfort zone. God has turned my life upside down numerous times throughout the past 20 years, and brought me to a beautiful place OUTSIDE of my comfort zone where I was priveliged to fully rely on Him. He had called me to lay down my Snuggie, pull on some grubbies and get my hands dirty, often times even providing me with the work boots or oversized gloves. I am always welcome to come back inside and warm myself by the fire, maybe even slip on a sweatshirt or blanket, but never with the intent to stay inside.
1 Corinthians 12:27 Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.
Christ has called and anointed us to be his body, and I am pretty certain that His body includes hands and feet. Though I know he calls us to dwell with Him in His Secret Place, wrapped up in our Snuggie with full view of the Light, He most definitely is also calling us to dress down and step down into the fog, to bring the illumination of his Truth to a generation that is wandering blindly.
'Bonding Time' with the Father is actually sounding fairly appealing now, ironically.